Time for some Honesty

Hello Everyone,

I hope that everything is treating you well. I wanted to say "thank you" to those of you who have been reading my blog and keeping up with the mission trip to Hong Kong. It was a great trip. Three kids accepted Christ (one being the first in his whole family), my love for the people there grew, and it reminded me that God's Kingdom is a lot more diverse than we give it credit for! I'm hoping that I will be able to go back next year.

A lot of times when I wrote a blog, I will give an update on what's going on with my life. Sometimes I may talk about what events I'm part of, books I'm reading, or just some random thoughts in my head. Rarely do I just vent or really go in depth about how I am feeling. I mainly don't do that because I don't want want to seem depressing or because I don't want to get personal online. This is a blog after all, and if you wanted to get more personal you could talk to me. Yet over the past several months, I have found it a little hard to talk about what's been going on and effectively communicate how I feel. So I am going to use this blog as a way to do that. This blog is not directed toward anyone in particular. Whether you are in a similar situation or totally opposite, this is mainly an outlet that I want to use for me and for others that want to see what's really going on.

Today is the first day of school for Williamson County. As most (if not all) of you know, I graduated this past December and have been applying for teaching jobs - mainly in Middle Tennessee. Since college I have been told since I was a male teaching in the elementary age group, I would have no problems finding a job. I was told that through classes, through student teaching, and by people inside and outside of the profession. Even though I appreciate the encouragement, I kind of wish they would have not told me that! I applied for several jobs, e-mailed some principals...and didn't hear anything. I kept rationalizing it saying that it's too early, they need to take care of this first, they still have some time, they are still reviewing my stuff, etc. Looking back, I know I probably wasn't as pro-active as I should have been and I should have broadened my outlook a little bit. From what I heard from people too, it's also to find a job here in Middle Tennessee regardless of profession. Whatever the reason, I didn't get employment as a teacher. To be honest, I'm a little disappointed. I love to teach. I could have been passed over because of my experience or because they felt that there was someone better for the job. I have some friends that did find employment teaching, and I am happy for them. They knew they wanted to teach since they could walk, and it's a dream for them. For me though, it's a different story.

To quote one of my professors, "It is what it is." Looking on the bright side, I still have employment at a job where I feel that I am contributing. I am still teaching Lifegroups and I am actually starting something new this year and helping to teach a children's Sunday School class. I love to teach and being able to teach about God makes it even greater. One reason I'm happy I didn't take a job elsewhere is because of these opportunities.

Did you know this is my 5th year with my Lifegroup? It's amazing how much they (and I) have grown since I met some of them in 6th grade. Now they are starting their first year of 10th. Then this Sunday I will be in a room full of 1st graders building relationships, learning about a new ministry, and growing myself. How come no one really wants to ask me about this? Whether in church or outside of church, it seems like people define you by what job you have. I know some of them are concerned, and I do appreciate that. But no one really asks me questions that I would like to answer. "What has God been doing in your life lately?" "Tell me about this year with your Lifegroups." "What is your favorite episode of Scrubs?" "What makes a perfect Hamburger?"

Kidding aside, I can say that things haven't turned out like I thought. As pastor Billy told me in Hong Kong, "Man proposes, God disposes." Right now I am keeping my eyes open for any open doors, trying to be content in all circumstances, and focusing on how to be a great leader for my guys and group I'm going to meet this Sunday.

Thank you for listening and for those of you who continue with prayers and support. Have a great rest of the day, and I wish you the best!